When the Bishop of Madison visited here a few weeks ago, he said something simple that I found very important. He reminded us that whenever we make the sign of the cross, we are making the statement that whatever we are doing or are about to do, we are doing in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. I have been trying to consciously think about this whenever I make this prayer.
When I realize I am doing something in the name of God, or for the sake of God, or in the place of God, however you word it, I want to do it to the best of my ability, and in a loving manner. Just a few minutes ago I was walking out of the chapel, and I crossed myself with holy water. I realized I was leaving the chapel in the name of the Trinity, and I resolved to do so with the intention of glorifying God.
I think it would be awesome if whenever we made the sign of the cross we realized this and acted in the manner it entails. We could be driving in the name of God, or studying in the name of God, or playing basketball in the name of God...anything. When we consciously think this, and order all our actions in the most loving way, we become more like Jesus. This is the goal, right - it should be!
St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us!
Saturday, December 8, 2007
Thursday, November 15, 2007
IHM Army
Every semester, the seminary takes a Wednesday night to educate the kids in CCD in the area (which I just found out stands for 'Confraternity of Christian Doctrine' - no wonder we just call it 'CCD'). We had an earlier than usual dinner, and we went in groups of two to different churches who all have their CCD classes on Wednesday evenings.
It was really cool - I felt like we were the IHM Army, fighting the good fight, going out to help form the younger troops. I went with Peter to Rushford. We first talked to 7th and 8th graders for a half our. First about the 10 commandments, because that is what they were studying that day, and then about vocation and how to grow in a relationship with God. Then we talked to 6th graders together with 10th and 11th graders for about 20 minutes. There we started with our personal relationship with God, and then with God's personal call to each of us.
These went so well, and it was one of those awesome Holy Spirit moments when I barely knew what I was saying, because God was speaking through me. We didn't do very much planning, we just went up there. The kids were attentive, and I think we really got a message across to them! Especially the message that God loves each of us, and has a plan for each of us. That he gave us our strengths and weaknesses for a reason, and that we must look to him, and get to know him before we can be certain of what he made us for, and that doing his will is the way to be the most happy.
On the way home, a deer ran into the side of our car! What happened to the car? Some of the dust was wiped off the side of the door - that's it! It was awesome - and when we got back, everyone was a-buzz about what had happened to them earlier. The Holy Spirit was very active in the seminary last night, and it was awesome to be a part of it!
St. Albert, pray for us!
It was really cool - I felt like we were the IHM Army, fighting the good fight, going out to help form the younger troops. I went with Peter to Rushford. We first talked to 7th and 8th graders for a half our. First about the 10 commandments, because that is what they were studying that day, and then about vocation and how to grow in a relationship with God. Then we talked to 6th graders together with 10th and 11th graders for about 20 minutes. There we started with our personal relationship with God, and then with God's personal call to each of us.
These went so well, and it was one of those awesome Holy Spirit moments when I barely knew what I was saying, because God was speaking through me. We didn't do very much planning, we just went up there. The kids were attentive, and I think we really got a message across to them! Especially the message that God loves each of us, and has a plan for each of us. That he gave us our strengths and weaknesses for a reason, and that we must look to him, and get to know him before we can be certain of what he made us for, and that doing his will is the way to be the most happy.
On the way home, a deer ran into the side of our car! What happened to the car? Some of the dust was wiped off the side of the door - that's it! It was awesome - and when we got back, everyone was a-buzz about what had happened to them earlier. The Holy Spirit was very active in the seminary last night, and it was awesome to be a part of it!
St. Albert, pray for us!
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Love Me For Me
Many people believe pride is the root of all sin.
Often times pride keeps us from doing the will of God. We want to do things our own way, and therefore ignore God's way. This is being prideful. Thinking that I'm so good, I don't even need God.
Another form of pride is looking around at other people and thinking how much better we are than them. This is much like the Jewish Pharisee in last Sunday's Gospel reading. He said to himself, '"I'm so good, thank God I'm not like these others." He was prideful and self-richeous.
However, there is a fine line between pride in one's own doing and sinful, pompous pride. This is a line I have been searching for, and am beginning to find. Being a musician is one of my gifts. However, at times I have felt a sort of embarrassment when someone would compliment me after a performance because I did not know how to take the compliment. I did not want to feel prideful or appear prideful. Then I would think how prideful it is to want to appear falsely humble. This became a confusing mess.
I am realizing that the only way to grow in humility, is to be aware of who we are in God's eyes. This is who I am. With all my gifts and talents, as well as my weaknesses. It is how he made me, and I should be grateful for the gifts he gave me. I must always be aware that without God we would not exist and that he is constantly keeping us in existence. After that, the choice to use my talents and develop them is up to me; I have that power. I have the power to grow in virtue by practicing virtuous behavior. I have the power to choose to do God's will.
The trick of it all and the reason we can not simply 'decide' to do it right now, is we must first come closer to God and come to a greater realization of who we are in God's eyes.
St. Joseph, pray for us!
Often times pride keeps us from doing the will of God. We want to do things our own way, and therefore ignore God's way. This is being prideful. Thinking that I'm so good, I don't even need God.
Another form of pride is looking around at other people and thinking how much better we are than them. This is much like the Jewish Pharisee in last Sunday's Gospel reading. He said to himself, '"I'm so good, thank God I'm not like these others." He was prideful and self-richeous.
However, there is a fine line between pride in one's own doing and sinful, pompous pride. This is a line I have been searching for, and am beginning to find. Being a musician is one of my gifts. However, at times I have felt a sort of embarrassment when someone would compliment me after a performance because I did not know how to take the compliment. I did not want to feel prideful or appear prideful. Then I would think how prideful it is to want to appear falsely humble. This became a confusing mess.
I am realizing that the only way to grow in humility, is to be aware of who we are in God's eyes. This is who I am. With all my gifts and talents, as well as my weaknesses. It is how he made me, and I should be grateful for the gifts he gave me. I must always be aware that without God we would not exist and that he is constantly keeping us in existence. After that, the choice to use my talents and develop them is up to me; I have that power. I have the power to grow in virtue by practicing virtuous behavior. I have the power to choose to do God's will.
The trick of it all and the reason we can not simply 'decide' to do it right now, is we must first come closer to God and come to a greater realization of who we are in God's eyes.
St. Joseph, pray for us!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Are you Stuck?
Many times we find ourselves stuck in the monotony of life. A vacation is a good idea to remedy this. We come back to our routine with a refreshed perspective on things and a new energy to work with. I recently experienced this with my prayer.
Lately I have doing almost all my prayer in a chapel in front of the Tabernacle or the exposed Eucharist. This is one of the best places to pray, no argument. But, I am not called to a monastic life, and sometimes I need to get out of the chapel to pray. I was having some touble with my prayer and my inability to get around a few things. But this past weekend I went on a couple walks by myself through the woods and found this very refreshing. I was able to be by myself with the Lord while surrounded by the beauty of His natural creation. And this past weekend was the peak weekend for fall colors, and so these walks were beautiful.
Another thing I have found helpful when stuck is to read something different. If you generally pray with the Bible, maybe picking a different book of the Bible. Or if you use other material, just grabbing something different for a change. Also talking to a friend can be helpful. Confession is also great. If you haven't been to confession lately, going can really free you up to be honest with yourself and with God.
The most important thing to do with regards to prayer, is not to stop even if it doesn't seem productive. Prayer is always worth while - it is spending time with Jesus, whom we have to make an attempt to center our lives around!
St. Theresa of Avila, pray for us!
Lately I have doing almost all my prayer in a chapel in front of the Tabernacle or the exposed Eucharist. This is one of the best places to pray, no argument. But, I am not called to a monastic life, and sometimes I need to get out of the chapel to pray. I was having some touble with my prayer and my inability to get around a few things. But this past weekend I went on a couple walks by myself through the woods and found this very refreshing. I was able to be by myself with the Lord while surrounded by the beauty of His natural creation. And this past weekend was the peak weekend for fall colors, and so these walks were beautiful.
Another thing I have found helpful when stuck is to read something different. If you generally pray with the Bible, maybe picking a different book of the Bible. Or if you use other material, just grabbing something different for a change. Also talking to a friend can be helpful. Confession is also great. If you haven't been to confession lately, going can really free you up to be honest with yourself and with God.
The most important thing to do with regards to prayer, is not to stop even if it doesn't seem productive. Prayer is always worth while - it is spending time with Jesus, whom we have to make an attempt to center our lives around!
St. Theresa of Avila, pray for us!
Friday, October 19, 2007
Precious Moments!
This past weekend, J.T. and I visited Madison, WI. We had a fall break from Saturday through Tuesday, and I decided to make a visit with Fr. Victor. Let me tell you about this man:
Fr. Victor Mosele was born in Italy 72 years ago. While in high school, his older brother joined a diocesan seminary and was encouraging Victor to think about doing the same. Being an energetic teenager, he could not imagine spending his whole life going back and forth from the church to the rectory. He desired adventure. Shortly after, he met some Xaverian missionaries (named after St. Francis Xavier) and decided they could help him serve God while having an adventure. He joined them out of high school.
He has since been in America for a long time, eventually helping build a seminary near Milwaukee. Then later, he went to Sierre Leone, Africa to be a priest and help set up schools for the people, as well as serve them in other ways. He helped set up about a dozen grade schools in 25 years - he saw them built from the ground up, and then served as the overseer of them all. After 25 years, rebel groups started terrorizing the country, but claimed to be freedom fighters. They destroyed all the schools, forced many of the children to fight as rebels, and eventually captured Fr. Victor. He was held captive for 5 years (with a short break somewhere during those years). He eventually escaped, and has been in America ever since, about 7 years now.
I met him when he was the assistant chaplain at ISU two years ago. After spending time with him this past weekend, I was amazed by his energy. He has the spunk of a new priest. He gives every minute of his day to God. I do not feel like I have the energy he has sometimes, and I'm 21! What I took away from Madison is a determination to waste less time. This does not mean to rush through things, but to be more structured and to dilly-dally less. It is very difficult to stay focused the whole day; even with this determination, I find I lose my focus sometime after dinner. But Fr. Victor has practice, and he has a great love for God, and this is key. You don't find many 72-year-old people of any occupation who give every minute their full attention, but even a priest who is not fervently in love with God will struggle to stay motivated.
St. Francis Xavier, pray for us!
Fr. Victor Mosele was born in Italy 72 years ago. While in high school, his older brother joined a diocesan seminary and was encouraging Victor to think about doing the same. Being an energetic teenager, he could not imagine spending his whole life going back and forth from the church to the rectory. He desired adventure. Shortly after, he met some Xaverian missionaries (named after St. Francis Xavier) and decided they could help him serve God while having an adventure. He joined them out of high school.
He has since been in America for a long time, eventually helping build a seminary near Milwaukee. Then later, he went to Sierre Leone, Africa to be a priest and help set up schools for the people, as well as serve them in other ways. He helped set up about a dozen grade schools in 25 years - he saw them built from the ground up, and then served as the overseer of them all. After 25 years, rebel groups started terrorizing the country, but claimed to be freedom fighters. They destroyed all the schools, forced many of the children to fight as rebels, and eventually captured Fr. Victor. He was held captive for 5 years (with a short break somewhere during those years). He eventually escaped, and has been in America ever since, about 7 years now.
I met him when he was the assistant chaplain at ISU two years ago. After spending time with him this past weekend, I was amazed by his energy. He has the spunk of a new priest. He gives every minute of his day to God. I do not feel like I have the energy he has sometimes, and I'm 21! What I took away from Madison is a determination to waste less time. This does not mean to rush through things, but to be more structured and to dilly-dally less. It is very difficult to stay focused the whole day; even with this determination, I find I lose my focus sometime after dinner. But Fr. Victor has practice, and he has a great love for God, and this is key. You don't find many 72-year-old people of any occupation who give every minute their full attention, but even a priest who is not fervently in love with God will struggle to stay motivated.
St. Francis Xavier, pray for us!
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Love is Our Vocation
We are all called to love. Whether we are students, businessmen, 5 years old, 90 years old, priests, parents, or bachelors, we are all called to love.
Last week I heard an idea that I have been thinking about since (is that a good excuse not to have blogged in a week?) This is the idea of transferring sin. Let us imagine an instance where a manager of a company is driving to work in the morning and gets cut off by another driver and swerves to the shoulder of the road. She is alright, but when she gets to the office, she is steaming with anger. She swears at the janitor as she walks to her office. He already missed breakfast and is now in a rotten mood. He does his work grudgingly and at the end of the day, when another man at the office approaches him about a minor issue, he gets in a big argument and this other man goes home and takes his anger out by kicking the dog. Sin is transferred from person to person until the dog absorbs it.
The wonderful thing people need to be reminded about is that Jesus already suffered for our sins. What we need to do is let Him absorb sin today. If any one of those people in the story had said, "Sin stops here," everyone else would have been saved from it. Does this mean we need to suffer these sins for everyone else? Sort of, but we already suffer from the sin when our boss yells at us in anger. All we need to do after that is completely let go of the pain, offering it to Jesus on the cross so that HE can absorb it. There is no need to give it to someone else. We are called to love, and Jesus suffered so that we could be free to do so.
But isn't there a time when we should stand up for ourselves? At first I thought there must be, we cannot let people walk over us all the time, but this is faulty. Imagine you get blamed for things at the office all the time - you are about to lose your job - should you say something to your boss, or just continue suffering from the sin and offering it to Christ? You should contiue suffering, with faith that Christ will bring a good out of it. Two possibilies come to mind right away: one thing that may happen is the person dishing out the pain starts wondering how you are able to take all this, and still be patient and kind to them. You are still sharing the extra dessert from your lunch with the person who might cost you your job. Another possibility is that you do get fired, but end up somewhere you are more happy. Whatever the case, you should always pray for the people causing you pain.
Love with patience and kindness, quietly suffer the sin inflicted on you, and offer the sin to Christ who loves you and already suffered for you!
Sacred heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!
Last week I heard an idea that I have been thinking about since (is that a good excuse not to have blogged in a week?) This is the idea of transferring sin. Let us imagine an instance where a manager of a company is driving to work in the morning and gets cut off by another driver and swerves to the shoulder of the road. She is alright, but when she gets to the office, she is steaming with anger. She swears at the janitor as she walks to her office. He already missed breakfast and is now in a rotten mood. He does his work grudgingly and at the end of the day, when another man at the office approaches him about a minor issue, he gets in a big argument and this other man goes home and takes his anger out by kicking the dog. Sin is transferred from person to person until the dog absorbs it.
The wonderful thing people need to be reminded about is that Jesus already suffered for our sins. What we need to do is let Him absorb sin today. If any one of those people in the story had said, "Sin stops here," everyone else would have been saved from it. Does this mean we need to suffer these sins for everyone else? Sort of, but we already suffer from the sin when our boss yells at us in anger. All we need to do after that is completely let go of the pain, offering it to Jesus on the cross so that HE can absorb it. There is no need to give it to someone else. We are called to love, and Jesus suffered so that we could be free to do so.
But isn't there a time when we should stand up for ourselves? At first I thought there must be, we cannot let people walk over us all the time, but this is faulty. Imagine you get blamed for things at the office all the time - you are about to lose your job - should you say something to your boss, or just continue suffering from the sin and offering it to Christ? You should contiue suffering, with faith that Christ will bring a good out of it. Two possibilies come to mind right away: one thing that may happen is the person dishing out the pain starts wondering how you are able to take all this, and still be patient and kind to them. You are still sharing the extra dessert from your lunch with the person who might cost you your job. Another possibility is that you do get fired, but end up somewhere you are more happy. Whatever the case, you should always pray for the people causing you pain.
Love with patience and kindness, quietly suffer the sin inflicted on you, and offer the sin to Christ who loves you and already suffered for you!
Sacred heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
The Jungle, Luke 16:19-31
I am reading for a class The Jungle by Upton Sinclair. It is about immigrants during the early 1900's who come to America seeking a better life. It is the most depressing book I've ever read.
It starts out very hopeful, but as we learn about the injustices of the free market, of the terrible working conditions and unsympathetic bosses, we lose hope. This is not to mention the other aspect of the book which is about the non-existant food and drug laws leading to fingers, rats, and diseased meat being ground up at the factories where everyone works at and sold to unsuspecting customers. The family is in a downward spiral of desolation.
Last night, I finished today's reading assignment at midnight, but putting the book down, I felt horrible. I realized the injustice of it all, and the little hope there was for this family, and I realized that this family is only one example of a million, or of a billion families even today. I also realized that this problem is more than one of the poor and their stuggle to survive, but it is also one of possible eternal damnation. People are suffering spiritually. Many people I've talked to regard rich areas as the most spiritually poor areas, and more in need of help than physically poor areas.
This problem is so big. When I think about it too long, I cannot bare it. The thing that scares me the most, is the fact that I, a seminarian who spends his days in prayer and the study of theology, took this long to realize all this. I have spent my whole life an optimist and have been blind to the depth of this issue. ETERNAL SUFFERING! Doesn't that mean anything to anyone? I know our God is a merciful God, but do we want to risk something this big? Do we want to gamble eternal life for the comforts of luxury cars, expensive meals, and casual sex; for greed, sloth, and lust?!
Welcome to life, I hope you enjoy it.
Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!
It starts out very hopeful, but as we learn about the injustices of the free market, of the terrible working conditions and unsympathetic bosses, we lose hope. This is not to mention the other aspect of the book which is about the non-existant food and drug laws leading to fingers, rats, and diseased meat being ground up at the factories where everyone works at and sold to unsuspecting customers. The family is in a downward spiral of desolation.
Last night, I finished today's reading assignment at midnight, but putting the book down, I felt horrible. I realized the injustice of it all, and the little hope there was for this family, and I realized that this family is only one example of a million, or of a billion families even today. I also realized that this problem is more than one of the poor and their stuggle to survive, but it is also one of possible eternal damnation. People are suffering spiritually. Many people I've talked to regard rich areas as the most spiritually poor areas, and more in need of help than physically poor areas.
This problem is so big. When I think about it too long, I cannot bare it. The thing that scares me the most, is the fact that I, a seminarian who spends his days in prayer and the study of theology, took this long to realize all this. I have spent my whole life an optimist and have been blind to the depth of this issue. ETERNAL SUFFERING! Doesn't that mean anything to anyone? I know our God is a merciful God, but do we want to risk something this big? Do we want to gamble eternal life for the comforts of luxury cars, expensive meals, and casual sex; for greed, sloth, and lust?!
Welcome to life, I hope you enjoy it.
Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us!
Monday, October 1, 2007
Surround Yourself with Good Friends
"Always surround yourself with good friends." That was the advice given to the seminarians of Peoria during the final conference of the St. Joseph's Days Retreat this past summer. And Fr. Brownsey said it with more compassion than I've heard him say anything, and this signified to me the importance of it. This is important for many reasons.
First of all, we are in the midst of a battle. We are in a battle for souls, whether we are conscious of the fact or not. The Devil tries to hide himself, hoping we forget about the battle, hoping we forget about him. He tries to slowly ease his way into our lives, making us bitter about life, or making us focus too much on one aspect of life, or by making us alcoholics, or by any number of other ways. He is like a thin wedge that slowly pushes its way into our lives. We may not even notice it, but a good friend or group of friends will notice it, and they can help you get back on the narrow path. Trust your friends.
Second of all, the world is very divided in its loyalties. Many people are more loyal to money, or pleasure, or the local government, no matter how corrupt it may be. These people are often not very tolerant of those of us who are loyal to the one God above all. There is power in numbers, and there is comfort in large groups. Not that we should always live in comfort, but to know we are in it together, through thick and thin, gives one a needed sense of courage.
Third, (but certainly final) friends are there to help us grow in virtue. Proverbs says 'iron sharpens iron as man sharpens his fellow man'. JT and I adapted this last year when we were roommates to 'keep sharpening the sword'. And Fr. Dittmer always said, 'if you want to be holy, surround yourself with holy people'. What all of these are saying is that a good group of friends strengthens each other, they better each other.
To go at it alone is foolish. Surround yourself with good friends.
St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us!
First of all, we are in the midst of a battle. We are in a battle for souls, whether we are conscious of the fact or not. The Devil tries to hide himself, hoping we forget about the battle, hoping we forget about him. He tries to slowly ease his way into our lives, making us bitter about life, or making us focus too much on one aspect of life, or by making us alcoholics, or by any number of other ways. He is like a thin wedge that slowly pushes its way into our lives. We may not even notice it, but a good friend or group of friends will notice it, and they can help you get back on the narrow path. Trust your friends.
Second of all, the world is very divided in its loyalties. Many people are more loyal to money, or pleasure, or the local government, no matter how corrupt it may be. These people are often not very tolerant of those of us who are loyal to the one God above all. There is power in numbers, and there is comfort in large groups. Not that we should always live in comfort, but to know we are in it together, through thick and thin, gives one a needed sense of courage.
Third, (but certainly final) friends are there to help us grow in virtue. Proverbs says 'iron sharpens iron as man sharpens his fellow man'. JT and I adapted this last year when we were roommates to 'keep sharpening the sword'. And Fr. Dittmer always said, 'if you want to be holy, surround yourself with holy people'. What all of these are saying is that a good group of friends strengthens each other, they better each other.
To go at it alone is foolish. Surround yourself with good friends.
St. Therese of Lisieux, pray for us!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
The Life!
I have had some great experiences lately of prayer and service, and I find myself looking forward to living out my possible Vocation as Priest of God! It seems like the most exciting way to live. But not only most exciting, most purposeful, most peaceful, most fulfilling. I know my vision is skewed right now, and I have not been thinking about the glories of the married life, which I'm sure is very much of all these things. But the priesthood -
I will get to spend every day of my life serving others. I will get to help bring countless people closer to Christ every single day. How can one live with regrets considering those things alone. I was very pleasantly surprised to experience this excitement at this point in seminary. I am just starting to get used to the routine of it all, and not more than two weeks ago I was in a gloom after realizing that I had only lived three weeks of the routine I will be in for many years to come. And yet I realize that the battle for souls is never-ending. On the most most boring, routine days, the battle is being fought, and I am daily given the choice to fight on the front lines or mope about the relentlessnes of it all. As long as I continue to choose to fight, life is never boring, and in fact it is more exciting than I can imagine any other vocation being on a daily basis.
After considering all this, I have a hard time understanding why anyone would not want this!? Young men need to be made aware of how exciting this life is. It is so fulfilling - living such a genuine life, not caring about how much cash I have on me or whether or not I have the right pair of jeans to make the ladies drool. I used to be worried about these things, but afte a while, they change you from what you are in your most genuine state, from how God made you to be.
My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord - Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!
I will get to spend every day of my life serving others. I will get to help bring countless people closer to Christ every single day. How can one live with regrets considering those things alone. I was very pleasantly surprised to experience this excitement at this point in seminary. I am just starting to get used to the routine of it all, and not more than two weeks ago I was in a gloom after realizing that I had only lived three weeks of the routine I will be in for many years to come. And yet I realize that the battle for souls is never-ending. On the most most boring, routine days, the battle is being fought, and I am daily given the choice to fight on the front lines or mope about the relentlessnes of it all. As long as I continue to choose to fight, life is never boring, and in fact it is more exciting than I can imagine any other vocation being on a daily basis.
After considering all this, I have a hard time understanding why anyone would not want this!? Young men need to be made aware of how exciting this life is. It is so fulfilling - living such a genuine life, not caring about how much cash I have on me or whether or not I have the right pair of jeans to make the ladies drool. I used to be worried about these things, but afte a while, they change you from what you are in your most genuine state, from how God made you to be.
My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord - Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
A Last Fall Before Fall
Sorry about the wait, but this story is worth it! This past weekend was a real adventure - I ended up with 3 staples in my head, and a slightly meaker spirit...
It happened on Saturday when I went disc golfing with my friends J.T., Matt, and Fr. Beerman. This is not just any old disc golf course - it is deep in the bluffs of MN. It has a small river running through it, and is covered in thick forest, steep hills, and as of late, mud. We decided to get in 9 holes before Adoration, but didn't make it past four. As we approached the fourth hole, we warned Fr. Beerman that there is a steep drop off on the right side of the hole that is to be avoided. But Fr. Beerman is left-handed, and if you know anything about disc golf, you can see why it was hard for him to avoid throwing it right - it is after all a very tight hole.
So I decide to go get his disc. It isn't a big deal - I've seen others go down there before, and I'm pretty experienced at off-roading it in forest preserves. However, the dirt was much drier than usual making it more slippery, and I was not as careful as I could have been, and I soon found myself loosing control. So I try grabbing a branch and missed it, but my other hand grabs a tree to my left. But as the tree turns me around, my hand slips off and I'm suddenly falling down this drop backwards - I am told I tripped over a log and smashed my head into a tree. I lost consciousness for an instant, but as I finish my tumble, I am back, and I stand up quickly to make it look like a minor slip in my quest for the disc. But after gaining my balance, I reach for the back of my head to massage the pain away - I find it to be wet. I then look at my hand and realize I'm bleeding from the back of my head.
To make a long story short, I walked to the road with the aid of J.T. and Matt, Fr. Beerman ran back to the seminary to grab his car and a cold rag, and we raced to the emergency room with J.T. in the back seat. It proved to be less than 10 minutes away and less than an hour and a half later, I was on my way home with 3 staples in my head.
It was crazy, but I am fine. The staples will be out in about a week, and the cuts on my arm, leg, ear, and head should be undetectable in a month or so.
It happened on Saturday when I went disc golfing with my friends J.T., Matt, and Fr. Beerman. This is not just any old disc golf course - it is deep in the bluffs of MN. It has a small river running through it, and is covered in thick forest, steep hills, and as of late, mud. We decided to get in 9 holes before Adoration, but didn't make it past four. As we approached the fourth hole, we warned Fr. Beerman that there is a steep drop off on the right side of the hole that is to be avoided. But Fr. Beerman is left-handed, and if you know anything about disc golf, you can see why it was hard for him to avoid throwing it right - it is after all a very tight hole.
So I decide to go get his disc. It isn't a big deal - I've seen others go down there before, and I'm pretty experienced at off-roading it in forest preserves. However, the dirt was much drier than usual making it more slippery, and I was not as careful as I could have been, and I soon found myself loosing control. So I try grabbing a branch and missed it, but my other hand grabs a tree to my left. But as the tree turns me around, my hand slips off and I'm suddenly falling down this drop backwards - I am told I tripped over a log and smashed my head into a tree. I lost consciousness for an instant, but as I finish my tumble, I am back, and I stand up quickly to make it look like a minor slip in my quest for the disc. But after gaining my balance, I reach for the back of my head to massage the pain away - I find it to be wet. I then look at my hand and realize I'm bleeding from the back of my head.
To make a long story short, I walked to the road with the aid of J.T. and Matt, Fr. Beerman ran back to the seminary to grab his car and a cold rag, and we raced to the emergency room with J.T. in the back seat. It proved to be less than 10 minutes away and less than an hour and a half later, I was on my way home with 3 staples in my head.
It was crazy, but I am fine. The staples will be out in about a week, and the cuts on my arm, leg, ear, and head should be undetectable in a month or so.
Friday, September 21, 2007
Seminary Life
So, I realize with words like 'Death' and 'Suffering' in the titles of my most recent entries, you may think I am not having a good time here. On the contrary, this place is great, and I feel certain this is really where God wants me right now. Let me tell you a little bit about it:
Every morning during the week, I get up at 6:00 for 6:45 Mass. Though it is sometimes a challenge to get up this early, it is such a priveledge to be able to start every day off with Mass. Plus, everyone has to do it, so that makes it easier, and we have a beautiful chapel that is one floor below my room in this building! We are expected to pray morning and night prayer, both of which take 15-20 minutes. We pray one of these as a community each day. I also pray night prayer, which is a little shorter, and a fantastic way to end the day. My brothers and I are good about keeping each other accountable, and I often pray night prayer and rosaries with a few guys.
We all have a normal college load of classes. I'm taking 16 hours, which includes a couple philosophy classes, a theology class, a litterature class, and Latin. I pretty much enjoy all of these - my favorites are theology, and Latin (believe it or not!) Most of my classes are primarily seminarians, but none of them are only seminarians. It is nice living with 5-10 guys in each of your classes for study purposes.
Also, we are very encouraged to stay physically active, and almost everyone here is in shape and athletic. We eat well, eating dinner as a community in the seminary almost every day. There is a choir, or schola as it is called, and I have gotten many chances to use my musical talents. It is a very rich lifestyle.
"Help me, Lord Jesus, to persevere in my good resolutions and in Your holy service till death. Help me to begin this day well, for up to now I have done nothing."
-A suggested morning prayer from 'The Imitation of Christ'.
Every morning during the week, I get up at 6:00 for 6:45 Mass. Though it is sometimes a challenge to get up this early, it is such a priveledge to be able to start every day off with Mass. Plus, everyone has to do it, so that makes it easier, and we have a beautiful chapel that is one floor below my room in this building! We are expected to pray morning and night prayer, both of which take 15-20 minutes. We pray one of these as a community each day. I also pray night prayer, which is a little shorter, and a fantastic way to end the day. My brothers and I are good about keeping each other accountable, and I often pray night prayer and rosaries with a few guys.
We all have a normal college load of classes. I'm taking 16 hours, which includes a couple philosophy classes, a theology class, a litterature class, and Latin. I pretty much enjoy all of these - my favorites are theology, and Latin (believe it or not!) Most of my classes are primarily seminarians, but none of them are only seminarians. It is nice living with 5-10 guys in each of your classes for study purposes.
Also, we are very encouraged to stay physically active, and almost everyone here is in shape and athletic. We eat well, eating dinner as a community in the seminary almost every day. There is a choir, or schola as it is called, and I have gotten many chances to use my musical talents. It is a very rich lifestyle.
"Help me, Lord Jesus, to persevere in my good resolutions and in Your holy service till death. Help me to begin this day well, for up to now I have done nothing."
-A suggested morning prayer from 'The Imitation of Christ'.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Death and Grace
This is a sort of meditation I wrote about a week ago that I hope you find useful. It is followed by some further insight I received from my new spiritual director, Fr. Wechter, this evening which really connects the meditation with my previous entry on suffering.
God asks us to die to ourselves - our own desires so that we may follow his will. Usually his will is something we would like to do, but we do not always realize it when he asks us. Sometimes the dying process is not altogether pleasant. Sometimes the things we need to die to are very good things; things good in the eyes of God, just not things God wants us to do right now. Often when we are in this process there is a temptation to replace the old with new. But that is not dying - it is stalling. When we are asked to die, we must act - first by asking God for help. We must decrease so that He can increase.
Something I have found challenging is the desire to do all things - to be on the frontline - a multitasker for God. But he has asked me to form myself. He has asked me to patiently grow closer to him forming my heart, and to apply myself to my studies, forming my intellect. While I know this is what he wants, it is sometimes frustrating, because I don't feel like I'm really doing anything at all. Though I understand that the experiences of praying in the chapel, and getting up at 6:00 am every day for mass, and studying philosophy are all important experiences, they don't feel important compared to evangelization and missionary work. This is of course where prayer and dying to myself comes in.
A great thing pointed out to me this afternoon was that one of the ways we can earn graces is by doing just what I've described - dying to your own will and living as God asks us. This essentially is what merits grace - cooperating with the grace already given us. And by living the will God has for us, we have a significant impact on the entire body of Christ. Knowing that my dying will benefit the entire Church as well as myself gives me a new motivation to persevere.
St. Francis of Assisi, pray for us!
God asks us to die to ourselves - our own desires so that we may follow his will. Usually his will is something we would like to do, but we do not always realize it when he asks us. Sometimes the dying process is not altogether pleasant. Sometimes the things we need to die to are very good things; things good in the eyes of God, just not things God wants us to do right now. Often when we are in this process there is a temptation to replace the old with new. But that is not dying - it is stalling. When we are asked to die, we must act - first by asking God for help. We must decrease so that He can increase.
Something I have found challenging is the desire to do all things - to be on the frontline - a multitasker for God. But he has asked me to form myself. He has asked me to patiently grow closer to him forming my heart, and to apply myself to my studies, forming my intellect. While I know this is what he wants, it is sometimes frustrating, because I don't feel like I'm really doing anything at all. Though I understand that the experiences of praying in the chapel, and getting up at 6:00 am every day for mass, and studying philosophy are all important experiences, they don't feel important compared to evangelization and missionary work. This is of course where prayer and dying to myself comes in.
A great thing pointed out to me this afternoon was that one of the ways we can earn graces is by doing just what I've described - dying to your own will and living as God asks us. This essentially is what merits grace - cooperating with the grace already given us. And by living the will God has for us, we have a significant impact on the entire body of Christ. Knowing that my dying will benefit the entire Church as well as myself gives me a new motivation to persevere.
St. Francis of Assisi, pray for us!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Suffering?!
For a long time, I have tried to understand suffering. The phrase 'offer it up' - what does it mean and why is it necessary. I am in a class called Mystery of Salvation that attempts to go through all the foundational ideas of Catholocism by going through most of the Catchecism and select areas of the Bible. Today we talked about prayer in the midst of which suffering came up. I finally have an understanding of the theology of it.
Paul writes to the Colossians in 1:24 "Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I complete what is lacking in Christ's afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the Church."
I've read this before, wondering what it meant. Didn't Christ do all for us when he suffered and died on the cross? What is lacking in Christ's affliction, and how can I do anything about it? The answer is that he did do everything for us, saving us from our sins, by subjecting his body to the suffering we deserved. However, we are part of Christ's body! Paul says in 1 Corinthians 12:27 "Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it." He chose to allow us, Christ's mystical body, to share in his suffering. And this, of course, is a great blessing; it is through this suffering that we are further sanctified. We not only grow in virtue by way of practice, (mortification) but in holiness by way of grace poured out by our Heavenly Father!
This explains how 'wheat' works, why we do penance after reconciliation, as well as how the deceased members of the body in purgatory benfit from our offerings of sacrifice. This is what it means to 'offer it up'. This is why Mary told the children of Fatima that many people were going to Hell who could be saved by graces attainable by personal penance.
I cut this entry short for the sake of your time - some theological questions are still in the air, and if you want the rest of it, just email me and I'd be happy to fill you in!
St. Sebastian, pray for us!
Paul writes to the Colossians in 1:24 "Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I complete what is lacking in Christ's afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the Church."
I've read this before, wondering what it meant. Didn't Christ do all for us when he suffered and died on the cross? What is lacking in Christ's affliction, and how can I do anything about it? The answer is that he did do everything for us, saving us from our sins, by subjecting his body to the suffering we deserved. However, we are part of Christ's body! Paul says in 1 Corinthians 12:27 "Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it." He chose to allow us, Christ's mystical body, to share in his suffering. And this, of course, is a great blessing; it is through this suffering that we are further sanctified. We not only grow in virtue by way of practice, (mortification) but in holiness by way of grace poured out by our Heavenly Father!
This explains how 'wheat' works, why we do penance after reconciliation, as well as how the deceased members of the body in purgatory benfit from our offerings of sacrifice. This is what it means to 'offer it up'. This is why Mary told the children of Fatima that many people were going to Hell who could be saved by graces attainable by personal penance.
I cut this entry short for the sake of your time - some theological questions are still in the air, and if you want the rest of it, just email me and I'd be happy to fill you in!
St. Sebastian, pray for us!
Monday, September 17, 2007
Power Hour and Daughters of St. Paul
I just got back from Power Hour, which is a praise and worship group that practices every Friday and praises every Monday at 9:15 in the St. Thomas Moore chapel on campus. It is fun and reminds me of the days I spent at ISU - really good group of musicians.
Anyway...
I thought it might be a good idea to explain why I feel I may be called to blog about the seminary. I have actually been thinking about keeping an online journal of some sort for a while, but realized I probably wouldn't keep it up. Every journal I've ever started has only lasted a couple weeks. But this past weekend made me re-think this.
A few of my brother seminarians and I met the Daughters of St. Paul, or the Pauline Sisters, this past summer. They run a fantastic Catholic book store on the corner of Michigan and Randolph. This past weekend was a free weekend, and we made arrangements to share a meal with them on Saturday night. We stayed at the St. Joseph seminary and took the El to their store/house and back.
Over dinner and after, something that kept coming up in conversation was the value of technology in spreading the Gospel. After all, their Apostolate involves evangelization through modern technology and media. How cool is that (anyone discerning should seriously check them out!) Sister Anne was saying how she uses twitter, blogs, and U-Tube to reach others (This is the address of her blog: http://romans8v29.blogspot.com). She also told us about how effective it has been. This made me reconsider technology and blogging in particular.
I find that as I got more into my faith, I got less into technology. Though this may be the way God is actually trying to lead me, I feel like it has been more reccently due to fear and apprehension. God doesn't drive you away in fear - he pulls you toward in love, as a wise friend once told me. So here I am, writing a blog. I hope it bears fruit!
St. Robert Bellarmine, Pray for us!
Anyway...
I thought it might be a good idea to explain why I feel I may be called to blog about the seminary. I have actually been thinking about keeping an online journal of some sort for a while, but realized I probably wouldn't keep it up. Every journal I've ever started has only lasted a couple weeks. But this past weekend made me re-think this.
A few of my brother seminarians and I met the Daughters of St. Paul, or the Pauline Sisters, this past summer. They run a fantastic Catholic book store on the corner of Michigan and Randolph. This past weekend was a free weekend, and we made arrangements to share a meal with them on Saturday night. We stayed at the St. Joseph seminary and took the El to their store/house and back.
Over dinner and after, something that kept coming up in conversation was the value of technology in spreading the Gospel. After all, their Apostolate involves evangelization through modern technology and media. How cool is that (anyone discerning should seriously check them out!) Sister Anne was saying how she uses twitter, blogs, and U-Tube to reach others (This is the address of her blog: http://romans8v29.blogspot.com). She also told us about how effective it has been. This made me reconsider technology and blogging in particular.
I find that as I got more into my faith, I got less into technology. Though this may be the way God is actually trying to lead me, I feel like it has been more reccently due to fear and apprehension. God doesn't drive you away in fear - he pulls you toward in love, as a wise friend once told me. So here I am, writing a blog. I hope it bears fruit!
St. Robert Bellarmine, Pray for us!
Sunday, September 16, 2007
The Beginning
This is the beginning of my blogging career. Part of me is not very excited about doing this, because I don't like feeling attached to my computer. But I think being disciplined in this manner and posting every night will be a good way of dying to myself and my own desires, and can be very useful to many who come across it. I feel like God has led me to this, and later I will explain how. First, I want to put up a disclaimer:
"People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway."
-Mother Teresa
I put that up for you and for me. I want to be 'honest and frank' in this blog. Part of me is afraid of putting up something only for the purpose of making myself look better, or of not putting something up because of being self-consious about my faith. You may think I am doing something with ulterior motives. I put up the disclaimer, one of my favorite quotes, to try to keep both of us honest and unsuspecting.
I hope this turns out to be a good thing for both of us (and yes, I will probably refer to you, the many readers, simply as 'you').
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!
"People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway."
-Mother Teresa
I put that up for you and for me. I want to be 'honest and frank' in this blog. Part of me is afraid of putting up something only for the purpose of making myself look better, or of not putting something up because of being self-consious about my faith. You may think I am doing something with ulterior motives. I put up the disclaimer, one of my favorite quotes, to try to keep both of us honest and unsuspecting.
I hope this turns out to be a good thing for both of us (and yes, I will probably refer to you, the many readers, simply as 'you').
Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!
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